Thursday, March 25, 2010

The saddest story

This story just gets to me.  It really does.

From Jack Newman's book, The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers :

By the time our third had been nursing over three years, my wife would ask him gently, from time to time, if he wasn't tired of it, if he wasn't a big boy who didn't need to nurse anymore.  At those times he would look up at her, and, without letting go of the breast, would smile at her and then continue nursing.  One day, for no obvious reason that I could ascertain, instead of smiling, he burst into tears and said, "No, not today, tomorrow."  And he never nursed again after that day. He did ask from time to time, but it was without conviction and he didn't insist.
p.314-5.

I do believe in child-led weaning, but the above story just, I don't know, gets to me.  I guess because I can see it played out in my head, and I just feel for that little boy. He sounds so forlorn.  I like the ending to the following story better.

From Sarah J. Buckley's Book, Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering :

A few months before his fourth birthday, Jacob announced, "You can stop giving me baboo now Mummy." "Okay, but what if you change your mind?"  "Just say no," he advised me.  So the next time he asked, I did this to which he replied, "I didn't mean it, Mummy!" *and they continued to breastfeed for several more months*. p. 244-5

When will I wean?  I have no idea, its all a process, an experience.  I know philosophically I would like for it to go beyond the age of 3 for health and emotional reasons, but as I said, its all a process.  I'm greatly enjoying finding out information currently though on "full term breastfeeding" (a much better phrase than extended or long term breastfeeding).

In response to comment:  I know, but I hate it when children sound forlorn.  True forlornness in a child is actually a rare emotion, and he just sounded so forlorn.

1 comment:

Suburban Screenprinting said...

I do think children need a little nudge sometimes. Sometimes they need to know you're okay with it too, and they can sense when you're not. I nursed W till he was 3.5, N till he was 3, G had to stop cold turkey at 14 months because I was on phenergan while pregnant with J (the hyperemesis and kidney/gallstones) and we'll see how long J goes. I wish I could have nursed her longer...I do think it has made small differences in small things that only a mother would notice. I think 3ish is good.